When we first started discussing whether or not to make the long trip to Oklahoma, it wasn't the logistics of a last moment trip that was on my mind. I was really in a battle with my fear.
- I was afraid of how the kids would handle the long trip
- I was afraid of dealing with Lydia at night in unknown situations (ie: being up until 2am with a screaming baby)
- I was afraid we would spend money we didn't have on the typical travel expenses
- most of all, I was afraid for our safety.
I kept thinking of all of the what if's. What if we were in a horrible accident and we all died, or what if just Dave and I died and the kids were on their own in a different country. What if we accidentally run off the road and all freeze to death...seriously, can you see how much I focus on death?
Deciding to make the trip was a big leap of faith for me. Dave was mostly concerned about money, whereas I was concerned about the unknowns. I had to let go of my fear for my family. I had to trust that God would either keep us safe or that he would care for us even if something terrible happened. I had to close my eyes and push past my fears.
None of the things I was afraid of came true, and all of them were allayed by a God who wants me to trust him and just LET GO.
We didn't run out of money. We shopped for some groceries beforehand and had enough food for the first 2 days (though some of it unfortunately froze, haha). We were very careful the rest of the time. If you take out the costs of hotels and fuel, we only spent $280 for the entire 8 days. Yes, sometimes we didn't eat a real dinner or even lunch, but we managed to make sure no one went hungry and it became a fun challenge for all of us to come up with affordable, healthy options to eat.
The kids had a good time. We grew closer together as a family. The kids bonded even closer as siblings. Lydia did great nearly every night, with no screaming.
We didn't get in a car accident or even anything close to it. Our experience with the hole in our tire as we entered a town showed me how I have no control over anything, and that our Lord cares about even the small things.
We did get the flu, but it wasn't nearly as bad as it could have been and we actually managed to deal with it pleasantly and without any major issues.
When it comes to deciding whether or not to jump into an unknown situation, I believe God wants us to trust him enough to just let go. Why not? Something very wonderful may be waiting on the other side.