I haven't had this perfect blissful feeling in a long time. I wasn't sure why I'm feeling this way, but upon closer inspection, it just feels like a "no strings" blessing.
The Lord has been so giving and merciful to us over the last couple of years, growing our faith and dependence on him. The tough part of faith growing though is that there are struggles attached. Nothing is easy. He has provided us with so many blessings, however it always seems to have a "But" in there somewhere that requires sacrifice or acceptance. For example: "Here is a job, BUT it comes with a relocation to the only place you said you'd never move to" (in retrospect, I think pretty much any of the Southern states would actually be worse, so once again, he knows best).
I've been preparing myself since I got pregnant for the news we would having another boy or the baby wouldn't be as healthy as we'd hope. I'm not sure if there was so much pressure on me because of my wishes, or because Elsa asked literally every day since we discovered the pregnancy "I hope it's a girl". Seriously, EVERY DAY, often 2 or 3 times. She had her hopes pinned on a sister and I just knew I would have come home and dash them.
I know that the Lord always gives us what we need, not necessarily what we want. Our job is to be thankful, grateful and accepting of whatever those gifts are. For this one thing, I am SO amazed and in awe that we were given what we wished for. The best part is that she is exactly what we NEEDED too. Elsa summed it up so well last night "now we have 5 healthy kids AND I get to have a sister!" Amen, my girl.
It was awesome to see our new daughter yesterday on the screen. She is an incredibly active little thing which made it difficult for the tech to get all her pics and measurements, but it worked out in the end. She was sucking her thumb, and appears to have Elsa's chin (so fun!).
Now I can start looking for sweet little girl things. One of the first things I want to get her are a pair of these sweet little shoes. I've been dreaming of a pair since I saw spotted them on Jami's blog 9 months ago or so. Now I can actually buy them to use!